Day 1573 A great group of men

25 06 2017

Yesterday my rugby brothers from college got together one of our teammates came home from Australia, it had been 19 years since we had been together. We had all come from a football background and that year we took the field we absolutely no idea what we were doing. We tried putting football concepts into Rugby which didn’t work and we also had to learn that Rugby was harder and more physical than any sport we had ever played. We started learning  about each other, realized that we had met the others equivalent of crazy, we drank together, partied, fought, ruled the city of Denton. We all needed an identity and a purpose and in doing that we developed a true brotherhood. This is a place to talk about some of the things we did, but I will tell you about how it turned out.

We lost the first 4 games we played. We were physical, mean and downright ignorant on the field. We took a me first attitude, mostly because we didn’t screw up but we were screwing up because we were about ourselves.   The games weren’t blow outs but they weren’t close and I was like what in the hell had I gotten into. After I played a game which was 80 minutes, 5 minute half time. everything hurt even my hair. We all were physical , we tried to break you in half on a tackle or run through you when we had the ball.  Like anything you learn but I thought can these football players learn a foreign sport and win at it. We were learning about each other, we had each others backs always, feared nothing, drank half of the city away, and had so much fun doing it.

Then it happened, we were in a tournament at SFA. We were up by a try or in america (touchdown) then we actually passed the ball 3 times and scored from 40 yards out. Nothing was the same again. We beat schools like, TCU, Texas, a touring professional side from England, Texas Tech we didn’t lose again. Rugby is a long season from September until May. Needless to say your body is beat up but unless its broke or your bleeding you play. I got stitched up on the sidelines once, I had to stick tampons up my nose so the bleeding would stop. We qualified for the TRU of Texas Rugby Union Collegiate playoffs This was a first for UNT. The hardest part of winning this title is you play 2 full games back to back. Saturday and Sunday. One game is hard enough but 2. Are you freaking kidding me. Of yeah btw a cold front had come and the field was covered in water and the temp that weekend was 40 high. Our first game wasn’t easy as thought but if I remember we won 40-20. I had mud in places I didn’t know were possible a;so the team we played once they knew they weren’t going to win they got cheap shots in. We couldn’t lose our cool we had something to lose and they didn’t. after a pass I got a cheap shot I had one hell of a thigh bone bruise. We had other guys that were hurt to. The thought that in less than 14 hours we have to take the field again to become champions.

Oh here is a big turn of events. The team we had to play Sunday to win it all didn’t have to play. I believe the team was Texas Tech or TCU they decided to forfeit. So we had to play Saint Edwards university for the title and they were fresh and in rugby that spells doom. With advil, maybe a shot or 2 of liqueur, and whatever else, we dragged ourselves into the fields. Most of had never had a championship or even came close but we were 80 minutes away. AS we huddled each looked each other in the eye. We were silent for the first time. We broke and knew that today was it. We were slow like a time that had just played less than 24 hours earlier and the other team was not. They were fast, and physical and smelled blood. Halftime though they were only up 10-7. big mistake for them. As bad has we hurt we were stubborn, physically dominate and now we were 40 minutes away. It was such a sloppy game, so much mud and water and cold. The ball wasn’t doing what we wanted for either side. 80 minutes ended tided 20-20. Overtime made we want to scream so I did.  Both teams were worn out. It had been one devastating hit after another. 2nd overtime starts and ends 20-20. Yes that’s correct. we were going through a 3rd overtime. Champions rise to the top, you looked around into the eyes of our guys and you could see exhaustion. I truly didn’t have a clue what would happen. I was dragging myself all over the field. My leg felt like it was going to fall off, guys with separated shoulders. One of the other teams guys had a cramp which allowed for a delay.. We were 8 meters out from scoring. Nothing left except the heart of a champion and the will. I hear one of the guys behind us yell at us now you could feel the energy, this was it, The scrums collided we pushed a d the whistle blew. I still to this day have no idea but we scored. It was over, the game was over. I looked at my buddy Jim did we score. He said we just won the  f…. game and we are the champions, we hugged each other like we had just got the best Christmas present ever. I then fell to my knees in exhaustion and I cried like a baby. We were champions. I was a champion. I truly had nothing left that day. I was empty from a physical standpoint but I felt like something I never had in my life.

That group of men is the greatest group of men I have ever spent time with. Nothing could take away what we did that day or what they meant to me that year. 19 years later we didn’t miss a beat except I was drinking tea, and I have less hair. That was my band of brothers. We who sheds his blood with me shall be my brother.

Thanks for reading





Day 1302 A BUT makes you a BUTT

8 09 2016

I miss writing so often but when the day ends there is not enough time or energy. I’m trying to make it a point to get back and blog. my mind needs the writers release. Even if nobody reads it, I still need it if that makes sense.

I have always defended myself even when it wasn’t necessary. I still do now because I still forget that I am worthy and I’m enough. That if I’m wrong I’m not that little boy who didn’t have his dad to guide my way so I had to be right or I was going to always make mistakes. I like to be right and who doesn’t but that’s an excuse. We were made not to be perfect but I keep thinking i have to always be perfect and if not I’ll argue with you until I am. The past 6 months have been filled with as many changes in my life than any other time. I’m trying to always be better but!!!! That word gets me always because I might agree with you but I need you to hear my side so you know that I’m okay. So Im still insecure, frightened, unsure, changing ball of a mess. I listen to God and then I stop listening and when I stop listening welcome to Tyler Wood and his interchanging “Buts”

Have you ever went and listened to yourself when you try to defend yourself. It sounds so stupid and when you’re having a good day you step back and say what in the hell did I do that for. What did it matter if I was right or wrong. I didn’t hear the other person, I probably hurt them and I didn’t listen to anything they said. All because Im so insecure, feel unloved, unattached from anyone or anything that I just need to be heard.

I was in an argument with my fiance and we were both wrong but God forbid if I actually shut up and not have to be the heavyweight champion of arguing. So I got the title that night and I hurt her feelings and made her feel that what she had to say wasn’t important. As soon as I said But i should have stopped because the moment I kept going I became a BUTT!

Im always a work in progress like we all are but if I have to  be the champion of But I will become the champion of the BUTTS too and I really don’t need another crappy crown.

We don’t always have to be right even when we are right. The BUT stops here. I hope it can stop with you too!





Day 989 Happy 40th birthday to me

12 10 2015

Yesterday after all the anticipation of it being here I did it. I turned 40. Friday I went back to my high school homecoming and got to see a lot of people. Conversation was generic but good to see people you grew up with.  Saturday got to watch my little boy play flag football and the light switch went on so he started playing amazing. Saturday night I had an amazing birthday party with my closest friends and then Sunday I had a surprise birthday with my family. I’ve never had a surprise party. It was really cool. I ate too much cake but that’s what it’s there for.

Last week after 3 years of getting my life back in order I was approved for a house and the option ended. At the end of this month I will be a home owner again. My kids will have their own room and my dog her own yard. Its been a road I wouldn’t change but man its been curvy, filled with pot holes, excuses, tears, blood, but new experiences, overcoming obstacles, great new friends, belief in myself, a new outlook on life and a true relationship with Jesus. I got overwhelmed yesterday in church and cried those big tears that rolled down my cheeks. 4 short years ago I sat in my car and had said I was sorry to everyone and said I’m sorry I wouldn’t make it to 40 years. To believe that I was ready to take my life and now I wouldn’t know what to do without the life I had is truly a miracle.

I’ve experienced a hell of a lot of life in these 40 years. So great and some not so much. I’ve seen myself at my worst and now to see what God made me to be at my best. I have the best surrounding me. People who want whats best for not because it benefits them but because that truly care about who I am. I got a ton of happy birthday messages on FB and text yesterday but I got 2 that touched my heart. Paraphrasing: you deciding to not take your life helped me get my life back and thank you. The world is a better place with you in it. When I read things like that turning 40 wasn’t so bad.  I have no idea what life has in store but man I’m so glad im here to experience it.

Thank you for reading this blog! Allowing me to throw out some thoughts, feeling and opinions that most don’t have. Loving me and my heart, watching me grow as a man, and never allowing me to do nothing more than be my best.

 





Day 903 He’s not done with me yet

17 07 2015

On Tuesday of this I was in a car accident. I was making a left hand turn and a lady ran the red light at 55. Its one of those moments where I started to turn and then I saw her coming and all I could say was oh crap. She spun me around 360 degrees I was facing the other direction. I could see that I was facing the wrong way and all my airbags had deployed, my car stopped running, Onstar was trying to talk to me and needless to say I was confused for a bit. I kept asking OnStar how they got into my car. I was dripping in sweat because of adrenaline but the AC was off too. My kids weren’t with me which was the biggest blessing because it would have hit on their side. I didn’t know what to do so I just sat there for a minute I wanted to check myself out but thought I was hurt so I just sat still.I started feeling around and throwing glass off of me. My stomach and shoulder hurt but I was just bleeding from my hand and the airbag was upsetting me so I cut it out of way. I started getting out of my car and the fire department was there and he was trying to help me get my door open. He said what are you doing. I said getting out of this car its hot in here. He said how are you getting out. I said I’m about to walk out if you move, but he said have you seen your car. I said no but I’ve been hit harder in a rugby or delivered a bigger hit. He said  wow man your supposed to be here. I got out called my buddy Jim and asked him to come get me. I then walked around the car and just shook my head. I couldn’t believe that I was hit that hard and at that speed and I was okay.

I put this part into not to brag but to show how far I’ve come as a man. The lady was hysterical she was yelling its my fault, I don’t have insurance, and I’m so sorry. My natural instincts and new heart took over. I just grabbed her and told her I love you its okay. She pulled back and said why are you saying its okay. I said because it’s an accident, I’ve had many times I hadn’t paid attention in the car to. I told her don’t worry its money and its all going to be okay. Please go get looked at! I hugged her one more time and she said you okay. I said my stomach hurts but otherwise Im good.  I started grabbing crap out of my car which looked like my son was let loose inside. My buddy Jim got there said you sure your okay you should get to the hospital. I’m good man I know my body well. He didn’t argue just drove me to get a rental car and then he picked up my kids. While standing in the rental car line I showed him my stomach and he said yep that’s going to hurt. He also said something else: Nobody walks away from that except you.

So after processing my thoughts here is what I’ve come up with. God’s not finished me yet. You might be saying stop being dramatic but its true. I’ve seen people die in wrecks a lot smaller. I walked away and was able to love someone who 5 years ago I would have went ballistic and lost it on the lady. It was just a reminder that when I doubt my purpose, my significance, or does God love me. I get a wink and told absolutely Tyler Wood you are one of my warriors carry on. So here’s to no more wrecks and a new car. Sad thing  is that car was only two weeks old. So here’s to even a newer car. Have a great weekend.





Day 885 I’m going to be famous

30 06 2015

Are you a fan of pizza? If you are I need your input on all the different types of pizza and the best ones. I never knew all the types but I got an education and now I’m ready for opinions but next blog. We had a tremendous weekend with our Rock Bottom Family and my little babies got to experience it as well. We got to go to sunny south Dallas and administer 200 backpacks and 100 hygiene packs. Mostly we got to love on people and my kids are turning into some of the best. Not only with hugs but to take the lead and love on others when society says don’t do that. I’m a super proud daddy.

After our radio show last Monday I got some of the negative feedback that rolls with doing what we do but almost all of it was positive. Two people who I would consider very good friends mentioned you’re going to be famous very soon based on your speaking and radio appearances.. I smiled and started processing that thought because that’s what I do. Most of my life I wanted to be famous either as a football, rugby player or stand-up comedian. I wanted people to worship the ground I walked on. All the names in lights, the money, the free stuff, and mostly the pick of women. I dreamed about it as a little kid, for a long time I thought it might happen then the dreams shattered and I wanted it more. I knew I was capable. How would it be to snap your fingers and get people to do what you wanted because they feared you and not respect you. At one time in my remodeling business I won Top 12 under 40 year remodelers in the United States. I thought I’m on my way. I’m going to be the go to guy, this will bring me more money, fame and you never know will it will lead.  Well it all eventually lead to my trying to take my life because of how I thought I failed. Through all of that what I wasn’t was remembered. The one thing you can’t control is being famous, I mean we have the Kardishans, the Hilton’s and various other people who have no talent and are famous. I mean grumpy cat is famous and he just was born with a grumpy face. Society dictates whose famous and its usually for the wrong reasons.

My two friends and anybody else that thinks Im going to be famous. I mean this thank you but I honestly I could care less. What I want is to be remembered. I want in my everyday walk in life for people to say that’s a tremendous man of God, he was an amazing father, one of the best husbands that walked  the earth, and real and genuine. When my funeral comes hopefully many years from now that there are so many people lined up they close down the streets to tell my children that your dad  loved God,  he was the best friend, son, brother, he believed in me when I couldn’t, he change my life, he loved me, he gave me what he didn’t have, and you should be proud of the man he was.  If that makes me famous I’ll sign up for that. The money, fame, name  in lights is about me, what I just mentioned is about God. Ill never forget when my dad passed away they talked about he did for others not the stuff he had. If I’m striving for the stuff I’ll get it but I know the outcome, if Im striving to be a warrior for God, with a broken past, foul mouth, wounded heart and people come to know Jesus through that I’ll be what I was designed for. I just want my kids to look people in the eye and say my dad was famous because he loved us and were proud of him. You can have your Hollywood I’ll take my Morgan and Brayden everyday!





Day 885 I’m going to be famous

29 06 2015

Are you a fan of pizza? If you are I need your input on all the different types of pizza and the best ones. I never knew all the types but I got an education and now I’m ready for opinions but next blog. We had a tremendous weekend with our Rock Bottom Family and my little babies got to experience it as well. We got to go to sunny south Dallas and administer 200 backpacks and 100 hygiene packs. Mostly we got to love on people and my kids are turning into some of the best. Not only with hugs but to take the lead and love on others when society says don’t do that. I’m a super proud daddy.

After our radio show last Monday I got some of the negative feedback that rolls with doing what we do but almost all of it was positive. Two people who I would consider very good friends mentioned you’re going to be famous very soon based on your speaking and radio appearances.. I smiled and started processing that thought because that’s what I do. Most of my life I wanted to be famous either as a football, rugby player or stand-up comedian. I wanted people to worship the ground I walked on. All the names in lights, the money, the free stuff, and mostly the pick of women. I dreamed about it as a little kid, for a long time I thought it might happen then the dreams shattered and I wanted it more. I knew I was capable. How would it be to snap your fingers and get people to do what you wanted because they feared you and not respect you. At one time in my remodeling business I won Top 12 under 40 year remodelers in the United States. I thought I’m on my way. I’m going to be the go to guy, this will bring me more money, fame and you never know will it will lead.  Well it all eventually lead to my trying to take my life because of how I thought I failed. Through all of that what I wasn’t was remembered. The one thing you can’t control is being famous, I mean we have the Kardishans, the Hilton’s and various other people who have no talent and are famous. I mean grumpy cat is famous and he just was born with a grumpy face. Society dictates whose famous and its usually for the wrong reasons.

My two friends and anybody else that thinks Im going to be famous. I mean this thank you but I honestly I could care less. What I want is to be remembered. I want in my everyday walk in life for people to say that’s a tremendous man of God, he was an amazing father, one of the best husbands that walked  the earth, and real and genuine. When my funeral comes hopefully many years from now that there are so many people lined up they close down the streets to tell my children that your dad  loved God,  he was the best friend, son, brother, he believed in me when I couldn’t, he change my life, he loved me, he gave me what he didn’t have, and you should be proud of the man he was.  If that makes me famous I’ll sign up for that. The money, fame, name  in lights is about me, what I just mentioned is about God. Ill never forget when my dad passed away they talked about he did for others not the stuff he had. If I’m striving for the stuff I’ll get it but I know the outcome, if Im striving to be a warrior for God, with a broken past, foul mouth, wounded heart and people come to know Jesus through that I’ll be what I was designed for. I just want my kids to look people in the eye and say my dad was famous because he loved us and were proud of him. You can have your Hollywood I’ll take my Morgan and Brayden everyday!





Day 879 The one that got away

24 06 2015

Yesterday I had a tremendous honor of being able to go with the two members of the Rock Bottom team and head down to Jennings Louisiana and do a radio show on HLE radio: hleradio.com. We were able to give our testimony and tell about what Rock bottom was doing. It was pretty amazing to find out today that 61,500 people listened to the show. Just to know by telling our story that we were able to reach that many and possibly one person could change their life is truly and amazing God story. Through that I was kind of emotional. Sometimes just knowing what you have been delivered through can bring out your emotions. Most times the encouragement is great and it was yesterday. One of my friends said man nobody really knows you. They have no clue the stories and life you had to get you to the point of telling how you were sitting in front of a microphone. You have a blog, and this outlet and its time to start sharing those stories that are an amazing part of you so people can relate to how you got here. I thought a lot about it on our 6.5 drive home and so I will start sharing a few of those in my blog. By no means can I share all of them in a public forum Lord only knows what would happen. So I’ll share the clean stuff or what clean means to me. Some of you may have heard this story in my early blog career so bear with me:

The one who got away: In 1997 I had been dating a girl who I “loved” and thought I was going to marry. We had struggles like most relationships in college, but nothing I thought we couldn’t work through. We took a trip for Spring break in March of 1997 to Puerto Vallarta Mexico. I worked three jobs to pay for it so I truly earned it. To clear up this story pretty quickly. When we got  on the plane to come she dumped me on the plane. Needless to say this didn’t go well. Once we landed I took her to my place in a tirade we got her stuff and I dumped her back at the dorm. This was the start of my downfall. I had been drunk 4 times in my life up to that point and for the next 33 days I was drunk everyday. My heart was broken because MY first love broke my heart. I woke up in a field and had no clue how I had gotten there. I was on the Deans list and honor society in college and i flunked all of my classes that semester. It’s easy to do when you don’t go. I was broken way before then but the was the topper. Some days I woke up and had no clue how I got there or why this gross girl was next to me I usually didn’t know her name and truly didn’t care. At the end of May I had ballooned up to my highest weight ever at 370 lbs and trouble walking and breathing. I had a friend named Laz that just casually mentioned man do you remember when you used to be a bad ass and now you can’t even see your feet. Something sparked in me that day and I decided I had to get better. I enrolled in Summer school and started working out again. Another friend  from high school brought me out to Rugby and over the summer I lost 100 lbs from running until I puked. I looked like I never had in my life and the girls started noticing or at least the girls I wanted to. I started summer school and to say that I tried to punish every girl who came in contact with me because how my heart was broken would be an understand statement. Between summer school and December of that year I was with over 100 women but there was one. Here name was Rebecca G. we had a biology and lab class together. She reminded me of Winnie from the wonder years. She was pre med and home for the summer taking classes. I had a natural draw to her so much she was not one of the 100. I never touched her in that way. Were different I’m an extrovert and she was an introvert, but she was so smart and willing to do the things I did to learn. Over  period of time she stopped dating this guy and she wanted to concentrate on me only. I still drank too much and did things you just shouldn’t do to people. I was a horrible human and manipulated so many women and physically hurt so many men. Rugby was my group of dudes who lived on the edge and did things that you only read about in books. My life was good I thought but still hollow. At the beginning of November she was up for the weekend and we talked and I told her that I wanted her and her only, She said that she was in but I had to stop getting drunk or I was going to kill someone or myself. I promised her and I did. She even took me to meet her parents which they loved me because all parents did. I thought I had found the one until….

I was in a fraternity too during this time and I wanted to go to my last fraternity formal in December. I actually went solo because Rebecca was studying for finals. It was in Austin and she was in Georgetown. I promised by 12 I would be back in Georgetown and we would spend the night together. After getting to the formal I hadn’t drunk in 3 weeks and hadn’t been drunk for 6 weeks. so I  passed on the alcohol but finally around 7 I took a shot of Jim Beam and a bottle and half later I was so drunk I had to be fed at the formal, and I got licks from my little brother in the fraternity and don’t remember it. They try to hurt you so I was embarrassing drunk. They took my keys and wallet from me which I’m so glad they did. I  passed out and when I woke up it was 2:45 in the morning. I never called her and when I found my phone there were 15 missed calls and 7 voice mails. The one I remember said I hope you’re not dead please don’t be dead but if your alive it’s over. I called her 5 times and she answered and I told her I was on my way. She said she didn’t care and she wouldn’t open the door. I got to her place at 4 and I was sitting outside her window crying and begging her to let me in. She finally did and told me to close the door but don’t come any closer. She said you lied to me and I thought you were dead. I’ve cried for 5 hours and you couldn’t call. I explained myself all for not and she said it was time to go. She gave me back a bag of clothes and 3 cards I had given her. I made to trip back to Denton with my heart-broken for a second time and this time no way to stitch it up.

When school started again in January I got a pic from her. It was a date we took on a carriage ride in Highland park looking at Christmas lights. It said I really loved you but your so broken you can’t be loved. I will always think about you! That was it! You know the rest of the story or maybe you don’t. I found my ex-wife in January the same month I got the picture. I thought about her a lot. She was really good to me and I think up until this point one of the very few girls that truly loved me. 3 years ago after my divorced I found her and emailed . She was the Head Pediatric Dr. at Vanderbilt University which had been her dream. My email was long and hers was very short. She said Im truly sorry about your divorce I still think about you and  have always loved you.  Thats the story about the one that got away!!

Thank you








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