Day 1807 the last 6 months

24 02 2018

Good saturday afternoon. This week in Texas we had a thunderstorm, ice and flooding all in one day. We are out of drought and now growing mosquitoes. Hold on my friends we might have snow before its all over.

As i sit and think about my dad today i remember the last 6 months of his life. Its the only time i got to know him. He told me the way he felt the day i was born, how he dreamed of me, how strong i was, how i always made him laugh. That besides my mom and sisters that we were the only good things that he did. His band he had in Germany, the way he felt when he drew and painted. How he and Buddy holly got in trouble. Why he started drinking, women he shouldnt have met. How he got scared, what he feared, when i first broke my leg how much he cried, when i took his alcohol away because he couldnt, when i shelled his peanuts so he wouldn’t go crazy when he stopped smoking.
The pride he felt when i walked across stage with my degree. The pain he felt when i looked him in the eye and he knew he didnt measure up, how much my mom was the greatest gift he had ever received. How much he loved my sister and asked me to promise to watch over until the day i die.
The final words i ever heard him speak were i wish i was half the man you were son and i love you please never forget that.

I ask you today if your relationship with your parents is on the outs, put down your pride and go to them. It took me 6 years after my dad died to appreciate the last 6 months he was with us but im so thankful i got to know him.
Take my advice not my pain. Go to them





Day 314 My losses really don’t mean crap

20 11 2013

Day 314 My losses really don’t mean crap.





Day 37 I love cookies

26 09 2012

Yes that’s right I love cookies. I haven’t had a cookie since May. I went to Kroger and the nice bakery lady asked if I wanted one. I said no but then turned around and grabbed one like I was an escaped convict. Gosh that cookie was good. I think I left the chocolate pieces on my face so later I could have it for desert. I looked like a baby after its first piece of birthday cake I m sure.

For those of you that read this know I do not have good grammatical skills. I probably don’t but I never go back and reread. I just write it raw and push publish. So starting today I m going to try to check it. So I hope all of you anal retentive people are happy.

I want to thank a few people today Heather, Jim, Kathy, and someone else who asked not to be put in the blog. You know what you did so thank you.

I m getting ready to go to my men’s group. I’ve missed it a lot.  It’s a great to have a group of men that will kick my butt and keep it real (Dr. Phil voice).

Finally my favorite blog of the day I would like you to read is : Very unique

http://thebatamonblog.wordpress.com/2012/09/26/one-lovely-blog-award-3/

I want to keep working on my life rules. Its taking a while because their my rules so I m still making them up.

#8 What I make up of my life is only up to me. I have all the tools I need to make my life up to me now  to me to use them. We all create our own reality. Nobody creates it for us. We have full authorship and ownership of our life its one of absolute right., but we have all and probably still do deny ourselves to script our life. We always deny ourselves because we say we don’t have the resources. If we look at it truthfully it’s not the external resources we don’t have that determine our success or failure but our own belief and willingness to create what we want. I or you can either engage in the blame game, making frequent statement ” I couldn’t because”  or take control of your life and shape it as you would like. Our life is play doh we can make it whatever we want or we can smash it into the carpet and complain that the play doh isn’t good anymore.

Joseph Campbell once said ” The world is a match for you, and you are a match for the world.” By this he meant that when we fully recognize our challenges, gifts and individual reality, and accept the life path they represent, the world provides whatever we need to succeed. You, in turn, will discover how you can make your greatest contribution to the world. When you claim authorship of your life story, the world responds and the genius ignites.

Responsibility: We have to accept the consequences of every deed, word and thought throughout our lifetime Elisabeth Kubler- Ross

Love ya all pass this along








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