Day 852 Its time to let go

28 05 2015

I was sitting in a courtroom this morning and its the last place I thought I would be sitting. I wont go into details  but I was trying to get something that had belonged to me for three years. It was something that I never thought would get to this point but it did. Sooner or later you have to stand up for yourself and I did. I should have done it sooner but I can’t understand why in God’s name why this person still feels the way they do towards me, So that leads to this.

Call it forgiveness, letting go or just finding your happiness. It really doesn’t matter what someone has done or perceived done to you. If you still hold hatred, bitterness, fear, anger towards someone I’m betting they have moved on and your still holding on to it. Its like your drinking poison from a big cup but hoping the other person gets sick. They don’t get sick only you. Life will never be what you want or dream it to be if you hold onto the crap. You think if I continue to rip them apart, talk and say the worst things about them, poke holes in their weaknesses I’ll feel better and I’ll show them. It will never happen. The person being hurt is you! Again the only person hurt is you. Since we are human we are entitled to the feelings and hurting a hurt with a hurt sometimes would feel better until you do it then you realize you lowered yourself to the level of the person you can’t stand.

God forgave us all! Tyler stop talking about God you don’t understand. I do understand, what forgiveness does and you don’t forgive, you don’t get it back. Forgiveness isn’t for the other person its for you. Believe I have a list of about 5 people who if I could give a piece of my mind to I could make them cry and bring them to their knees but truthfully what does that do.  What you’re hoping for is that somebody that you loved or maybe didn’t doesn’t ever feel the way you did. I can honestly say I still care for the person and truly wish only great things for them, but seeing the feelings that they have cared with them their whole not about me but everyone from their past is downright sad.

IF your stuck and the only things you want to do is make someone like a fool in public, rip them apart on social media or talk crap to your kids about someone your truthfully the one that looks like a fool. Its time!!! Its time to let it go. Your life begins again when you realize the crap you hold onto is only poisoning you.

God gave me a 2nd chance to change my life and without forgiving my dad, and a few other people I would still be the miserable piece of crap I was. I’m living proof that forgiveness or letting go opens your eyes to life. Let go and let God. If you don’t believe in God I’m sorry but believe in something or your fall for anything!!!!

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Day 852 Its time to let go

27 05 2015

I was sitting in a courtroom this morning and its the last placed I thought I would be sitting. I wont go into details  but I was trying to get something that had belonged to me for three years. It was something that I never thought would get to this point but it did. Sooner or later you have to stand up for yourself and I did. I should have done it sooner but I can’t understand why in God’s name why this person still feels the way they do towards me, So that leads to this.

Call it forgiveness, letting go or just finding your happiness. It really doesn’t matter what someone has done or perceived done to you. If you still hold hatred, bitterness, fear, anger towards someone I’m betting they have moved on and your still holding on to it. Its like your drinking poison from a big cup but hoping the other person gets sick. They don’t get sick only you. Life will never be what you want or dream it to be if you hold onto the crap. You think if I continue to rip them apart, talk and say the worst things about them, poke holes in their weaknesses I’ll feel better and I’ll show them. It will never happen. The person being hurt is you! Again the only person hurt is you. Since we are human we are entitled to the feelings and hurting a hurt with a hurt sometimes would feel better until you do it then you realize you lowered yourself to the level of the person you can’t stand.

God forgave us all! Tyler stop talking about God you don’t understand. I do understand, what forgiveness does and you don’t forgive, you don’t get it back. Forgiveness isn’t for the other person its for you. Believe I have a list of about 5 people who if I could give a piece of my mind to I could make them cry and bring them to their knees but truthfully what does that do.  What you’re hoping for is that somebody that you loved or maybe didn’t doesn’t ever feel the way you did. I can honestly say I still care for the person and truly wish only great things for them, but seeing the feelings that they have cared with them their whole not about me but everyone from their past is downright sad.

IF your stuck and the only things you want to do is make someone like a fool in public, rip them apart on social media or talk crap to your kids about someone your truthfully the one that looks like a fool. Its time!!! Its time to let it go. Your life begins again when you realize the crap you hold onto is only poisoning you.

God gave me a 2nd chance to change my life and without forgiving my dad, and a few other people I would still be the miserable piece of crap I was. I’m living proof that forgiveness or letting go opens your eyes to life. Let go and let God. If you don’t believe in God I’m sorry but believe in something or your fall for anything!!!!





Day 843 What we have here is a failure to communicate

19 05 2015

Once again I made myself so tired from the weekend that I feel asleep with a book in my hand last night. That crap of learning by osmosis isn’t working either. At least I look smart falling asleep.  I’m also pretty lucky because my family got to hear my testimony this weekend. Rock Bottom Outreach spoke at a church in Azle and everything just fell into place for them to be there. AS excited as I was I had no idea how they would respond. They cried and I know they understand me just a tad bit more. Needless to say Big Jesus showed up!

Sometimes I can be the greatest communicator on earth and other times not so much. I heard a speaker once say that once you stop asking questions, asking why, and assuming that you have started your trek to failure. I failed in my marriage because I thought I knew everything I needed to about her and our life and it started to show I didn’t care. I stopped asking. Assumption is poison. Why? How many times did you get mad at someone who didn’t ask you about something and you got mad. When you asked them why and they said I just thought I knew. I instill in my kids never assume because you will always be wrong. Why not ask and just save the pain?

Why because it hurts to hear the truth. It might be uncomfortable but if you can’t or don’t conflict arises and nobody likes conflict. Well mostly nobody! I have learned this more in the dating world. If you have a failure to communicate or won’t communicate I’m not the guy for you. I learned with hiding my junk it caused ripples which turned into waves. You don’t have to communicate and that’s okay but not for me. When I got real with God I got to see the true me but came to expect to see that in everybody else. It doesn’t happen that way. I want to see any and everything about you. Yes even that. I know your thinking he’s going to judge me. I try so hard not to judge but guess we all judge. No matter how hard we try. My first judging turns into appreciation that you shared. There is not a better compliment that I opened up to you because I feel I could talk to you about anything.

This blog may seem pointless and not very deep and I’m sorry it’s not more  but I think it has so much here in the few words I typed. If your hearing the great Cool Hand Luke in the back of your mind tell you “what we have here is a failure to communicate” then you have failure and its time to open that mouth and ask.





Day 843 What we have here is a failure to communicate

18 05 2015

Once again I made myself so tired from the weekend that I feel asleep with a book in my hand last night. That crap of learning by osmosis isn’t working either. At least I look smart falling asleep.  I’m also pretty lucky because my family got to hear my testimony this weekend. Rock Bottom Outreach spoke at a church in Azle and everything just fell into place for them to be there. AS excited as I was I had no idea how they would respond. They cried and I know they understand me just a tad bit more. Needless to say Big Jesus showed up!

Sometimes I can be the greatest communicator on earth and other times not so much. I heard a speaker once say that once you stop asking questions, asking why, and assuming that you have started your trek to failure. I failed in my marriage because I thought I knew everything I needed to about her and our life and it started to show I didn’t care. I stopped asking. Assumption is poison. Why? How many times did you get mad at someone who didn’t ask you about something and you got mad. When you asked them why and they said I just thought I knew. I instill in my kids never assume because you will always be wrong. Why not ask and just save the pain?

Why because it hurts to hear the truth. It might be uncomfortable but if you can’t or don’t conflict arises and nobody likes conflict. Well mostly nobody! I have learned this more in the dating world. If you have a failure to communicate or won’t communicate I’m not the guy for you. I learned with hiding my junk it caused ripples which turned into waves. You don’t have to communicate and that’s okay but not for me. When I got real with God I got to see the true me but came to expect to see that in everybody else. It doesn’t happen that way. I want to see any and everything about you. Yes even that. I know your thinking he’s going to judge me. I try so hard not to judge but guess we all judge. No matter how hard we try. My first judging turns into appreciation that you shared. There is not a better compliment that I opened up to you because I feel I could talk to you about anything.

This blog may seem pointless and not very deep and I’m sorry it’s not more  but I think it has so much here in the few words I typed. If your hearing the great Cool Hand Luke in the back of your mind tell you “what we have here is a failure to communicate” then you have failure and its time to open that mouth and ask.

 

 





Day 453 I thought I killed my weeds

28 04 2014

I love Denton Texas. Its weird and its so personable.  It’s a little Austin Texas and it had started being developed the last 10 years. You can do just about anything here. Every year we have the Denton Arts and Jazz Festival. It brings on about 30 different acts Blues, Jazz, Country and some light rock. Vendors and fair type food. Our Rugby club gets to work security for the gates and I usually get to work the main stage. Last night I counted in over 5600 people of all shapes, sizes and colors but the best thing is everyone is friendly. I would say it was my good looks but I’ll stick to everyone is friendly.  If you have never been please come to  the Arts and Jazz Fest its a great time.I’m writing this blog so I can go back and read it over and over. If you happen to get something out of it I hope you can move you to make a few changes. We talked in church today about unforgiveness and bitterness. The church was pretty quite and nobody seemed to have to go tot he bathroom either. People listened even me.. No matter how far I have come I still have both bitterness and unforgiveness for people.  My list is smaller but I thought I was done with it until I heard this message today. When I had my house I loved planting a garden. The one thing I hated was those pesky weeds but I my tried hard everyday picking those weeds. If I didn’t my garden would have started to be choked out then eventually is would die. Our life is like our garden. Unforgiveness (weeds) will lead us to start growing the bad things day by day and then before you know it the good in our heart and life is gone which then develops bitterness. We have to pick those weeds and start now because once bitterness sets in  we start  saying I can’t do (forgive, we can’t love, we can’t see people for they are). We actually can but we won’t because of our harden heart . UnForgiveness and bitterness is like drinking poison and hoping for the other person to get sick. We start finding peace in the pain. We begin to believe that we are above the spiritual laws of the kingdom.I thought I was done with my weeds of unforgiveness. Sitting in church I realized I am still bitter. Its caused me to close off my heart and not to trust. You can’t love someone when you haven’t forgiven. You can’t live the life that you deserve when your bitter. You can’t believe in yourself and when the weeds start choking you we are destined to choke out and die. At least I know the weeds I need to pull. I will ask a few to hold me accountable and as usual I always have something to work on. This isn’t something Roundup works on either. You have to pull them at the root. So here’s to earning my green thumb.

 





Day 453 I thought I killed my weeds

28 04 2014

I love Denton Texas. Its weird and its so personable.  It’s a little Austin Texas and it had started being developed the last 10 years. You can do just about anything here. Every year we have the Denton Arts and Jazz Festival. It brings on about 30 different acts Blues, Jazz, Country and some light rock. Vendors and fair type food. Our Rugby club gets to work security for the gates and I usually get to work the main stage. Last night I counted in over 5600 people of all shapes, sizes and colors but the best thing is everyone is friendly. I would say it was my good looks but I’ll stick to everyone is friendly.  If you have never been please come to  the Arts and Jazz Fest its a great time.

I’m writing this blog so I can go back and read it over and over. If you happen to get something out of it I hope you can move you to make a few changes. We talked in church today about unforgiveness and bitterness. The church was pretty quite and nobody seemed to have to go tot he bathroom either. People listened even me.. No matter how far I have come I still have both bitterness and unforgiveness for people.  My list is smaller but I thought I was done with it until I heard this message today. When I had my house I loved planting a garden. The one thing I hated was those pesky weeds but I my tried hard everyday picking those weeds. If I didn’t my garden would have started to be choked out then eventually is would die. Our life is like our garden. Unforgiveness (weeds) will lead us to start growing the bad things day by day and then before you know it the good in our heart and life is gone which then develops bitterness. We have to pick those weeds and start now because once bitterness sets in  we start  saying I can’t do (forgive, we can’t love, we can’t see people for they are). We actually can but we won’t because of our harden heart . UnForgiveness and bitterness is like drinking poison and hoping for the other person to get sick. We start finding peace in the pain. We begin to believe that we are above the spiritual laws of the kingdom.

I thought I was done with my weeds of unforgiveness. Sitting in church I realized I am still bitter. Its caused me to close off my heart and not to trust. You can’t love someone when you haven’t forgiven. You can’t live the life that you deserve when your bitter. You can’t believe in yourself and when the weeds start choking you we are destined to choke out and die. At least I know the weeds I need to pull. I will ask a few to hold me accountable and as usual I always have something to work on. This isn’t something Roundup works on either. You have to pull them at the root. So here’s to earning my green thumb.





Day 453 I thought I killed my weeds

27 04 2014

I love Denton Texas. Its weird and its so personable.  It’s a little Austin Texas and it had started being developed the last 10 years. You can do just about anything here. Every year we have the Denton Arts and Jazz Festival. It brings on about 30 different acts Blues, Jazz, Country and some light rock. Vendors and fair type food. Our Rugby club gets to work security for the gates and I usually get to work the main stage. Last night I counted in over 5600 people of all shapes, sizes and colors but the best thing is everyone is friendly. I would say it was my good looks but I’ll stick to everyone is friendly.  If you have never been please come to  the Arts and Jazz Fest its a great time.

I’m writing this blog so I can go back and read it over and over. If you happen to get something out of it I hope you can move you to make a few changes. We talked in church today about unforgiveness and bitterness. The church was pretty quite and nobody seemed to have to go tot he bathroom either. People listened even me.. No matter how far I have come I still have both bitterness and unforgiveness for people.  My list is smaller but I thought I was done with it until I heard this message today. When I had my house I loved planting a garden. The one thing I hated was those pesky weeds but I my tried hard everyday picking those weeds. If I didn’t my garden would have started to be choked out then eventually is would die. Our life is like our garden. Unforgiveness (weeds) will lead us to start growing the bad things day by day and then before you know it the good in our heart and life is gone which then develops bitterness. We have to pick those weeds and start now because once bitterness sets in  we start  saying I can’t do (forgive, we can’t love, we can’t see people for they are). We actually can but we won’t because of our harden heart . UnForgiveness and bitterness is like drinking poison and hoping for the other person to get sick. We start finding peace in the pain. We begin to believe that we are above the spiritual laws of the kingdom.

I thought I was done with my weeds of unforgiveness. Sitting in church I realized I am still bitter. Its caused me to close off my heart and not to trust. You can’t love someone when you haven’t forgiven. You can’t live the life that you deserve when your bitter. You can’t believe in yourself and when the weeds start choking you we are destined to choke out and die. At least I know the weeds I need to pull. I will ask a few to hold me accountable and as usual I always have something to work on. This isn’t something Roundup works on either. You have to pull them at the root. So here’s to earning my green thumb.








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