Day 1792 Why Divorced/single in 2018 is more devastating

20 05 2018

Good happy Sunday may evening, I’m about to have a Jr and 4th grader, The school years fly by when you get older. I thought Christmas break was just over and look here we are about to end school and start smelling like BO because of the Texas heat.  Here’s to grilling, BO, sunburns, farmers tan, peeing in the pool and chlorine/swimming pool bath.

Excuse my use of the word devastating put an end to the existence of (something) by damaging or attacking it. This is not directed at anyone and I know there is always another side to my argument. To save your breath, your right I’ll just be the other side.

The world we live in now is ruled by social media, the fake life of what we want you to see. You leave someones, page, site, profile and like OMG they are so great why can’t I measure up.

People quit at everything now. there is no perseverance ( yes  i know there is some) in relationships, people think the next one will be right. For better or worse or let me get to know this person that doesn’t happen. My friend said her boyfriend or girlfriend did this why don’t you?Well because were different and we all bring good and bad to the table.

Loyalty I wonder without looking could someone tell you the definition. could someone tell you that an emotional affair is the same as a physical.  And honesty. Just be honest tell me everything. I know your not single in today’s world because you did nothing wrong. If its only 10% tell me your 10%. A date ender for me is what did you do wrong in your relationships. if the other person says well he! I stop it right there! Why because I’m not going to date him and I don’t care what he did at this moment. Tell me about you. Throw every damn card on the table and let me choose if I want to move  forward.

There is nothing more refreshing than someone being real and telling, I screwed up this way, I know it now and I want to change it and I’m working so hard on it. Im insecure but if you will be patient with me we can get through. Im like heck yes someone who gets.

I hear people say sex has to be great and they have to be physically attractive. Absolutely but if you can’t communicate and your checking over their shoulder every time they are doing something you will fail. If you don’t trust in the beginning, do you really think your going to trust down the road? What about the night sex sucks. wouldn’t it be great to say let me explain where my head was today. It wasn’t you and you list out why it sucked. She understands, she cares more, she gets you. She becomes more emotionally attached then you feel like she respects and wow you have a fully functional relationship. Who knew!!!!

Finally nobody really wants to be married anymore! It might be the hardest thing to do in this twisted, social media world, where you’re told to run rather than stay and fight (not actually fight). I would much rather have someone that loves me more often, wants to choke me some days but will just poke me with a toothpick (in love) than date!!!!

Why are you in a relationship if you’re not going to be devoted/ married to the person forever. Really whats the point. That is a first date question. Dont lie, if that’s not your intention that’s okay but for the love of God tell them. Just be honest! I want to be married again, if someone tells me that they don’t that’s okay, doesn’t make you a bad person just means you dont fit me.

PS. Not everyone is going to like you! Not every person you date is going to feel it. Dont get your under roos in a wad, learn one thing from the date and move on. We are looking for one great person not an army!

Okay that’s enough for today! Love you





Day 850 Can we rid the family of this curse

26 05 2015

We are still getting rain. Many places I like to go are under water and will be until of the middle of July. The rain can move on but at least everything is green. The only good thing is people are staying in so if you’re trying to do things you can get a front row seat.  Also I’m so proud that One year ago yesterday I was baptized by a great friend Brian Hackney. Lord only knows that it hasn’t been easy and the silent battles have hurt but I’m here and better for it. I couldn’t be more thankful for the path I have chosen to listen to and follow which is not my own. It’s never easy but worth it.

Have you heard or do you every say. My family is jinxed, nothing ever goes right for my family. I grew up that way. In mainstream now its called generational or family curses. It’s a mindset that will ruin your life and it does carry down from one generation to the next. The reason why is what you believe is what will come true. Here are the things I’m talking about: idolatry,  sexual sins, drugs and addictions (often even alcohol and pain killers are thought necessary to be “confessed”), believing Satan’s lies too easily, fearfulness, unbelief and skepticism, deceit and dishonesty, pride, rebellion, anger, wishing for death (for oneself or for others), violent acts, vulgar and abusive language, bad musical tastes etc. (I took that actual list from a web page which recommends ).  I bet if we look at our families some of the things slipped down to us and we can’t help. We teach our kids by words but truly the only thing they learn from is action. Here’s an example: In my home growing up we argued, yelled and sometimes threw things.  I know all unhealthy but it’s how we rolled. I get married to someone where they got mad and just ignored each other and 6 weeks later it blew. Both ways are wrong and they say  never go to bed mad but I didn’t I said my peace but she never did. When she got mad I had forgotten already what she was mad about. The cures of how you fight or argue is carried down. Or how many of know someone who their parent was an alcoholic and your friend said I will never be an alcoholic but because what they were taught in action they became an alcoholic. Whatever you want to call it a curse, a jinx things get passed down good or bad. When you say not me yes you to. They can be crippling and if the curse isn’t broken it will continue to the end of time so what do we do………

First of all you have to realize the devil is here to steal, kill and destroy you. He’s good at it to. He can make you believe the actual crap that you truly know is false. First this is God’s battle and not yours. You can break it but you first have to admit it. This is actually true for anything in life. You admit it your chances of repair it can actually take place. Once you know your battle you can take it to God and feel like hey I can connect with God on this. You have to stop blaming other people for what you do. It doesn’t matter what you saw or continue to see. The  only person responsible for you is you. People argue this with me all the time. It doesn’t matter what anybody does to you how you speak and react to the situation is all on you.  We all know right from wrong. You do right you get right you do wrong etc… You have to forgive whoever passed down the curse in your mind, and then get some help to get the thoughts out and start working on erasing them. This is the hard part but the most rewarding. I still have those demons but I can at least recognize them and start working on what it does to my mind. Never give up hope and never think your weird or different. I mean were all weird (especially this guy) but everything can be changed if you want it to be.





Day 850 Can we rid the family of this curse

25 05 2015

We are still getting rain. Many places I like to go are under water and will be until of the middle of July. The rain can move on but at least everything is green. The only good thing is people are staying in so if you’re trying to do things you can get a front row seat.  Also I’m so proud that One year ago yesterday I was baptized by a great friend Brian Hackney. Lord only knows that it hasn’t been easy and the silent battles have hurt but I’m here and better for it. I couldn’t be more thankful for the path I have chosen to listen to and follow which is not my own. It’s never easy but worth it.

Have you heard or do you every say. My family is jinxed, nothing ever goes right for my family. I grew up that way. In mainstream now its called generational or family curses. It’s a mindset that will ruin your life and it does carry down from one generation to the next. The reason why is what you believe is what will come true. Here are the things I’m talking about: idolatry,  sexual sins, drugs and addictions (often even alcohol and pain killers are thought necessary to be “confessed”), believing Satan’s lies too easily, fearfulness, unbelief and skepticism, deceit and dishonesty, pride, rebellion, anger, wishing for death (for oneself or for others), violent acts, vulgar and abusive language, bad musical tastes etc. (I took that actual list from a web page which recommends ).  I bet if we look at our families some of the things slipped down to us and we can’t help. We teach our kids by words but truly the only thing they learn from is action. Here’s an example: In my home growing up we argued, yelled and sometimes threw things.  I know all unhealthy but it’s how we rolled. I get married to someone where they got mad and just ignored each other and 6 weeks later it blew. Both ways are wrong and they say  never go to bed mad but I didn’t I said my peace but she never did. When she got mad I had forgotten already what she was mad about. The cures of how you fight or argue is carried down. Or how many of know someone who their parent was an alcoholic and your friend said I will never be an alcoholic but because what they were taught in action they became an alcoholic. Whatever you want to call it a curse, a jinx things get passed down good or bad. When you say not me yes you to. They can be crippling and if the curse isn’t broken it will continue to the end of time so what do we do………

First of all you have to realize the devil is here to steal, kill and destroy you. He’s good at it to. He can make you believe the actual crap that you truly know is false. First this is God’s battle and not yours. You can break it but you first have to admit it. This is actually true for anything in life. You admit it your chances of repair it can actually take place. Once you know your battle you can take it to God and feel like hey I can connect with God on this. You have to stop blaming other people for what you do. It doesn’t matter what you saw or continue to see. The  only person responsible for you is you. People argue this with me all the time. It doesn’t matter what anybody does to you how you speak and react to the situation is all on you.  We all know right from wrong. You do right you get right you do wrong etc… You have to forgive whoever passed down the curse in your mind, and then get some help to get the thoughts out and start working on erasing them. This is the hard part but the most rewarding. I still have those demons but I can at least recognize them and start working on what it does to my mind. Never give up hope and never think your weird or different. I mean were all weird (especially this guy) but everything can be changed if you want it to be.

 





Day 743 Church VS Cleavage… and the winner is

9 02 2015

I miss football already. I know its been a week but I love it and  I know it misses me. I left with college basketball that nobody care about for 3 more weeks,  the NBA that I don’t care about until the playoffs, Hockey and spring training baseball. Well At least we can watch chess on ESPN late at night.

At the beginning of church today it was 70 degrees. Everybody is so happy with that, that Facebook  its full of how great the weather is updates. If you ve been to Texas you know we have the most beautiful women here. I’ve traveled a lot and I don’t think its close. With that comes women that know their gorgeous and need to show it. I will be the first to say I appreciate it. Until I get to church! Look I’m single if I see skin I’m like a little boy in the candy store. We as men are simple creatures and it doesn’t take a lot for us to spiral out of control with our sexual thoughts, but I would hope that church would be a safe haven. I walk into church this morning and I really mean the first person I see is a woman with a v neck shirt on that has cut the V and now most of all the cleavage was showing. God did bless her for sure but I was like come on already. As I’m walking in I started playing the cleavage police. I know who am I to play that part when it wasn’t assigned to me but I started counting. I’m a numbers guy what can I say ,at 20 women I stopped counting inappropriate shirts that were on. Then this is no lie there were 4 women that had their thong showing because their shirt was so short.  Please don’t tell that’s so gross you were looking. Okay really, when was the last time you saw someone in a wheelchair, a car wreck or someone on crutches and didn’t stare. I’m a man and I looked but I couldn’t believe it.

I have enough problems with temptation but I should expect that at least at church you could cover yourself up for an 1.5 hour.  Your self-esteem may suck but when you dress like that anywhere you know that you’re looking to get guys to look at you. Guess what and we do and it will never be the look that your striving for. These were married and single women. I’m sorry you think that even in church that you have no worth but you do and it’s not in the assets God gave you. Wear a scarf, a coat or hell go by a Sunday T-shirt that says I love Jesus but cover up. Every person that walks into a church is struggling with something and the last thing we need are boobs staring at us.

So guess who sits the aisle over from me. The first lady I saw when I got to church. I tried not to stare but I suck at not staring.  If any man tells you that he wasn’t looking is a liar sometimes the assets are so good that your eyes have a mind of their own.Get this, when we get up to leave she actually tells her husband did I have something on my face because people were staring at me. That’s when I wish  Staples invented the slap button because I would have pushed the button and told her to wake up.

We men will objectify you and I’m sorry but if you wear clothes like that you are not helping especially in church. God loves you no matter what you look like but if  what you want is stares and men like that then good luck. There’s something to be said for what someone doesn’t know is good for them, in this case if only your man or potential man knows what you look like that a plus for both of you. If I need to see assets I can go to Hooters, Twin peaks, etc…  not church. Help me help you and all other man. Cover up in church please I’m trying to ask for my sins to be forgiven not create a bunch more sins sitting there.

THE WINNER IN THE FIRST ROUND KNOCKOUT CLEAVAGE!!!!!! Ding Ding





Day 743 Church VS Cleavage… and the winner is

8 02 2015

I miss football already. I know its been a week but I love it and  I know it misses me. I left with college basketball that nobody care about for 3 more weeks,  the NBA that I don’t care about until the playoffs, Hockey and spring training baseball. Well At least we can watch chess on ESPN late at night.

At the beginning of church today it was 70 degrees. Everybody is so happy with that, that Facebook  its full of how great the weather is updates. If you ve been to Texas you know we have the most beautiful women here. I’ve traveled a lot and I don’t think its close. With that comes women that know their gorgeous and need to show it. I will be the first to say I appreciate it. Until I get to church! Look I’m single if I see skin I’m like a little boy in the candy store. We as men are simple creatures and it doesn’t take a lot for us to spiral out of control with our sexual thoughts, but I would hope that church would be a safe haven. I walk into church this morning and I really mean the first person I see is a woman with a v neck shirt on that has cut the V and now most of all the cleavage was showing. God did bless her for sure but I was like come on already. As I’m walking in I started playing the cleavage police. I know who am I to play that part when it wasn’t assigned to me but I started counting. I’m a numbers guy what can I say ,at 20 women I stopped counting inappropriate shirts that were on. Then this is no lie there were 4 women that had their thong showing because their shirt was so short.  Please don’t tell that’s so gross you were looking. Okay really, when was the last time you saw someone in a wheelchair, a car wreck or someone on crutches and didn’t stare. I’m a man and I looked but I couldn’t believe it.

I have enough problems with temptation but I should expect that at least at church you could cover yourself up for an 1.5 hour.  Your self-esteem may suck but when you dress like that anywhere you know that you’re looking to get guys to look at you. Guess what and we do and it will never be the look that your striving for. These were married and single women. I’m sorry you think that even in church that you have no worth but you do and it’s not in the assets God gave you. Wear a scarf, a coat or hell go by a Sunday T-shirt that says I love Jesus but cover up. Every person that walks into a church is struggling with something and the last thing we need are boobs staring at us.

So guess who sits the aisle over from me. The first lady I saw when I got to church. I tried not to stare but I suck at not staring.  If any man tells you that he wasn’t looking is a liar sometimes the assets are so good that your eyes have a mind of their own.Get this, when we get up to leave she actually tells her husband did I have something on my face because people were staring at me. That’s when I wish  Staples invented the slap button because I would have pushed the button and told her to wake up.

We men will objectify you and I’m sorry but if you wear clothes like that you are not helping especially in church. God loves you no matter what you look like but if  what you want is stares and men like that then good luck. There’s something to be said for what someone doesn’t know is good for them, in this case if only your man or potential man knows what you look like that a plus for both of you. If I need to see assets I can go to Hooters, Twin peaks, etc…  not church. Help me help you and all other man. Cover up in church please I’m trying to ask for my sins to be forgiven not create a bunch more sins sitting there.

THE WINNER IN THE FIRST ROUND KNOCKOUT CLEAVAGE!!!!!! Ding Ding

 





Day 706 I got my watch back

3 01 2015

Happy New Year. I would write about resolutions and other New Years crap but you already know what to do. Here’s a big tip. You never have to diet if you’re not putting bad food in you. TaDa I saved you a lot of time.

This may seem like a dumb blog to a lot of you but I got my watch back. We had two Weddings. On JP wedding and then the big one $$$ in July 2000. We bought each other some very nice gifts for a wedding. I got a Tag Hauer watch see below:

tag

I’m sure you like okay and so what. I wore the watch and loved it for 12 years. In 2012 I broke a link in it and I sat it aside. Why did I do that because it came from her my Ex. I wanted nothing to do with it because it came from her. I had rid myself of almost everything that she and I shared together, had or was given to me. In a night of drunken and I mean drunken stupidity I burned poems, songs, pictures anything I could have that belonged to “US”I was like I’ll show you. I wish who I was trying to show because I burned a lot of things that were special and I created.  The watch I missed wearing but I put it in my box of life and honestly I forgot about it. After thanksgiving I was looking for a picture to show my daughter and I’ll be damned there was ” The Watch”. I picked it up and saw the broken link and said I guess its time. I took it to my jeweler and had it repaired.  Time for what? Time to continue the forgiveness process. I picked up my watch this past Tuesday and I swear it was like a Hollywood moment where I had flashbacks of the past 16 years when I slid it on my wrist.  I smiled as I latched it back on my wrist. I m sure I had the weirdest smile on my face. For the first time since I had owned that watch i was appreciative of it and the memories (all the memories) that came with it. The anger and hate were gone and I was more appreciative of my relationship with my ex and what the watch meant when it was given.

If you’ve never been married on been in a long-term relationship you wont get what I felt. Honestly you need to feel “the Watch” so you can understand. Life is about rising from the ashes, making bad memories good  and seeing things the way they should be. Showing appreciation for things you never thought you could. Divorce is a one painful event. I can honestly say the last two years I have grown more than I ever thought I could or wanted. The watch was a reminder and one place I never thought I would find a sense of peace. You maybe thinking I will never be where you’re at . I hate him or her and what they did. Forgiveness is the most amazing gift you can give yourself. Not because you have to but because life is worth it. When you see me and my watch on my arm just smile and know it’s a sign of forgiveness and I needed that.





Day 706 I got my watch back

2 01 2015

Happy New Year. I would write about resolutions and other New Years crap but you already know what to do. Here’s a big tip. You never have to diet if you’re not putting bad food in you. TaDa I saved you a lot of time.

This may seem like a dumb blog to a lot of you but I got my watch back. We had two Weddings. On JP wedding and then the big one $$$ in July 2000. We bought each other some very nice gifts for a wedding. I got a Tag Hauer watch see below:

tag

 

I’m sure you like okay and so what. I wore the watch and loved it for 12 years. In 2012 I broke a link in it and I sat it aside. Why did I do that because it came from her my Ex. I wanted nothing to do with it because it came from her. I had rid myself of almost everything that she and I shared together, had or was given to me. In a night of drunken and I mean drunken stupidity I burned poems, songs, pictures anything I could have that belonged to “US”I was like I’ll show you. I wish who I was trying to show because I burned a lot of things that were special and I created.  The watch I missed wearing but I put it in my box of life and honestly I forgot about it. After thanksgiving I was looking for a picture to show my daughter and I’ll be damned there was ” The Watch”. I picked it up and saw the broken link and said I guess its time. I took it to my jeweler and had it repaired.  Time for what? Time to continue the forgiveness process. I picked up my watch this past Tuesday and I swear it was like a Hollywood moment where I had flashbacks of the past 16 years when I slid it on my wrist.  I smiled as I latched it back on my wrist. I m sure I had the weirdest smile on my face. For the first time since I had owned that watch i was appreciative of it and the memories (all the memories) that came with it. The anger and hate were gone and I was more appreciative of my relationship with my ex and what the watch meant when it was given.

If you’ve never been married on been in a long-term relationship you wont get what I felt. Honestly you need to feel “the Watch” so you can understand. Life is about rising from the ashes, making bad memories good  and seeing things the way they should be. Showing appreciation for things you never thought you could. Divorce is a one painful event. I can honestly say the last two years I have grown more than I ever thought I could or wanted. The watch was a reminder and one place I never thought I would find a sense of peace. You maybe thinking I will never be where you’re at . I hate him or her and what they did. Forgiveness is the most amazing gift you can give yourself. Not because you have to but because life is worth it. When you see me and my watch on my arm just smile and know it’s a sign of forgiveness and I needed that.








Matthew Winters (Honest Thoughts from a Pastor)

The life, ministry, & thoughts of a Christ-follower, husband, dad, & minister

LifeVersePoetry

Live. Love. Write.

My True North

A certain darkness is needed to see the stars.

Megha Bose

A peek into Megha's mind

jesussocial

Christian News, Devotional, Leadership, Church, Evangelism, Conference, Worship, Pastors , Bible, Gospel Music,Gospel,Salvation, GoodNews, Disciples, Cross,Winning, Love, Mercy,Bible Study,New Testament, Church,Matthew,Mark, Luke, John,Heart, Soul, Body,Mind,Spirit,Church History, Books, Pastorso, Evangelists. Teachers, Apostles, Healing, Leadership, Grace, Salvation, Faith,Lifestyle and Entertainment,

JADIKANLAH AKU RAJA

Invite Rizky FAUZI as Speaker - 08986800220 (Chat WA) | SUPPORT HAMIKU SUCCESS with SHARE IT | Setelah DIBACA timbal baliknya harus di-SHARE soalnya gak gratis... - RIZKY FAUZI

iksperimentalist

a collision of science and comedy

This is My Story, This is My Song.

This is my journey with faith, love, acceptance, redemption through God's incredible grace and mercy!

Surviving the affair....the cheaters perspective

I cheated. Yip I did it, I am not proud of it, but that won't change a thing. This is my story of me trying to survive one day at a time. No guarantees....

Light of Darkness

Every moment of light and dark is a miracle

%d bloggers like this: