Day 839 Is this what its like to feel loved

15 05 2015

I know what God wants me doing. I know it, feel it and its a fulfilling feeling. I got lucky to hear God and he put me in touch with people who over 2 years brought me to Rock Bottom Outreach. There is no way in my normal life I would have ever been friends with these people just through my normal walk in life. Not only do I have these amazing people in my life but I’m also allowed to share my testimony. Some people say big deal does it matter, I couldn’t do it, why do you air your dirty laundry? For those that don’t know me God gave me a gift to lead, speak and be vulnerable. When he gives you something you run with it. For me I can and will get up in front of any and everybody to share from the moment I came into the world until where I stand now and tell you how I screwed up and my story or redemption not perfection. Why do I do it, why does Rock Bottom do it because we offer hope to the weak, weary, defeated, and the ones that are ready to end their life. We need it to as a part of our journey in healing. Last night was another amazing example of when I doubt what were doing and what I’m doing that God shows up and shows out.

We spoke to a group of youth and adults in Springtown Texas at Hilltop church. When I walked in your could feel the need and I was ready. I was very emotional last night and have no idea why and asked to go last. If I wouldn’t have I would have cried my the whole time but I went last and made it. The our team rocked it with Power testimonies which each of us gets 3 minutes. Its quick but you can through a lot of life in when you’re hitting the high notes. I talk about suicide in my message. I understand it and lived. I know what its like to feel worthless, unworthy, that everything you touch turns to garbage, that life will never get better. I also know that’s a lie from the pits of hell. I tried to end my life but I got lucky and now its my turn to share and change lives. After Rock Bottom and the message we get to stay around and talk to whoever wants to talk to us. The tough part about suicide is talking about it one on one and feeling someone elses pain. Two 7th grade girls approached me and said can I talk to you about suicide. I listened intently and inside I’m dying for them. I wont tell the whole story of both but I spoke some real talk to her and then talked to the adult leadership how to help her. Sure there was teenage drama to her talk but she was serious and then the there are moments that leave you speechless. I gave both girls hugs and one girl looked at me and said is that what its like to feel loved. I stepped back and I guess she saw the confusion on my face and said the hug you just gave me. I said I hope so sweetie.  I walked away with tears running down my eyes and said thank you God. Me being open and showing I care for this girl maybe for the first time in her life felt loved.

I got in my car and said no matter what I have screwed up in my life Jesus was like carry on my good and faithful son you’re doing my work and I love you!! Thanks for reading!!





Day 839 Is this what its like to feel loved

14 05 2015

I know what God wants me doing. I know it, feel it and its a fulfilling feeling. I got lucky to hear God and he put me in touch with people who over 2 years brought me to Rock Bottom Outreach. There is no way in my normal life I would have ever been friends with these people just through my normal walk in life. Not only do I have these amazing people in my life but I’m also allowed to share my testimony. Some people say big deal does it matter, I couldn’t do it, why do you air your dirty laundry? For those that don’t know me God gave me a gift to lead, speak and be vulnerable. When he gives you something you run with it. For me I can and will get up in front of any and everybody to share from the moment I came into the world until where I stand now and tell you how I screwed up and my story or redemption not perfection. Why do I do it, why does Rock Bottom do it because we offer hope to the weak, weary, defeated, and the ones that are ready to end their life. We need it to as a part of our journey in healing. Last night was another amazing example of when I doubt what were doing and what I’m doing that God shows up and shows out.

We spoke to a group of youth and adults in Springtown Texas at Hilltop church. When I walked in your could feel the need and I was ready. I was very emotional last night and have no idea why and asked to go last. If I wouldn’t have I would have cried my the whole time but I went last and made it. The our team rocked it with Power testimonies which each of us gets 3 minutes. Its quick but you can through a lot of life in when you’re hitting the high notes. I talk about suicide in my message. I understand it and lived. I know what its like to feel worthless, unworthy, that everything you touch turns to garbage, that life will never get better. I also know that’s a lie from the pits of hell. I tried to end my life but I got lucky and now its my turn to share and change lives. After Rock Bottom and the message we get to stay around and talk to whoever wants to talk to us. The tough part about suicide is talking about it one on one and feeling someone elses pain. Two 7th grade girls approached me and said can I talk to you about suicide. I listened intently and inside I’m dying for them. I wont tell the whole story of both but I spoke some real talk to her and then talked to the adult leadership how to help her. Sure there was teenage drama to her talk but she was serious and then the there are moments that leave you speechless. I gave both girls hugs and one girl looked at me and said is that what its like to feel loved. I stepped back and I guess she saw the confusion on my face and said the hug you just gave me. I said I hope so sweetie.  I walked away with tears running down my eyes and said thank you God. Me being open and showing I care for this girl maybe for the first time in her life felt loved.

I got in my car and said no matter what I have screwed up in my life Jesus was like carry on my good and faithful son you’re doing my work and I love you!! Thanks for reading!!





Day 151 Crash Test Dummy

6 06 2013
The year started with my baby girls broken heart from her parents getting a divorce. Yesterday she showed how strong she was with 10 awards and that beautiful smile.  I m so proud of you Morgan wood you make the world a better place. My daughter is a overcomer. Her smile is back from the beginning of the year when her eyes always looked like she was going to cry.  Her elementary years were such a struggle with our marriage,, business and life falling around all of us. Now she goes to Jr high and she will always be my baby squirt but she’s not a little girl anymore. I sat in a parking lot in Irving today tearing up I thanked God for letting me realize where I was going wrong and now I can continue to build her up rather than tear her down.

You ever remember watching the crash test dummies in the car crash videos. It was violent live but in slow motion you got to watch every inch of the dummy snap, throw itself forward. I actually got to watch this in all my travels in Detroit near the Ford Factory. I would sit and watch over and over. I was amazed by it I know sadistic but I watched from ever angle. Each time the dummies hit the  impact was the same and the violence the same. What I was astonished about is that the dummy was used over and over again and made it through each time. We are all crash test dummies. We know the wall that’s coming we have seen it time and time again. It could happen at a different speed, or angle but each time we pull ourselves back and do it again. What happens if one time we actually see the wall coming and veer to the right or left. We can actually change the violent nature  of our life, we can remove the  scar, the curse, the fear and see what we truly are capable of. I had this very conversation last night. I have been a crash test dummy for to long. So what if I veer and still hit another wall hell I know what it feels like. Its time for each of us  now  to finally get out of the  car  stop the pain and stop calling ourselves a dummy.

 

 





Day 109 Touch this

22 04 2013

Day 109 Touch this.

Ever just watch people.  I went to my first quincianera last night which was amazing I was the only white guy but it was an amazing  people event and after that I went to our Rugby bar to celebrate the bar’s 3 year anniversary. People are great with or without alcohol, but get them the drunk or tipsy and they will do anything. I saw some of the craziest dancing, eating and yelling about nothing. I listened to a couple talk about the proper way to pet a dog, two other guys talk about shaving their pubes, two girls talked about eating lipstick. I laughed a lot and sat back and wondered also why they let us drink when it causes those types of conversations.

This past week has been one of the worst I have had in two years. With what went on in the country itself  in Boston and West Texas that was enough, but my week in work was horrible, I had a blow up with my daughter and ex and on Friday a loan we were working for 3 months fell through. I also didn’t handle the week well. With anger, sadness, and all out leave me alone  attitude I m thankful that tomorrow is Monday. The one thing I haven’t experienced since my last two years of marriage and divorce is physical touch. My love language is physical touch and it’s hard to function without it. BTW if you don’t know your love language it’s imperative you find out so you know how you need to be loved. 5 Love languages by Dr. Gary Chapman. When you don’t get your love language you just don’t function in the manner designed. This week I needed the physical touch. It’s not just the sex which most people think. It the holding of hands, hugging just a simple acknowledgement.  I know I craved it this week. It was weird because I almost didn’t even know what the feeling was. Long story short find your love language that makes you tick and someone to share that with because it make a crappy day better.





Day 109 Touch this

21 04 2013

Ever just watch people.  I went to my first quincianera last night which was amazing I was the only white guy but it was an amazing  people event and after that I went to our Rugby bar to celebrate the bar’s 3 year anniversary. People are great with or without alcohol, but get them the drunk or tipsy and they will do anything. I saw some of the craziest dancing, eating and yelling about nothing. I listened to a couple talk about the proper way to pet a dog, two other guys talk about shaving their pubes, two girls talked about eating lipstick. I laughed a lot and sat back and wondered also why they let us drink when it causes those types of conversations.

This past week has been one of the worst I have had in two years. With what went on in the country itself  in Boston and West Texas that was enough, but my week in work was horrible, I had a blow up with my daughter and ex and on Friday a loan we were working for 3 months fell through. I also didn’t handle the week well. With anger, sadness, and all out leave me alone  attitude I m thankful that tomorrow is Monday. The one thing I haven’t experienced since my last two years of marriage and divorce is physical touch. My love language is physical touch and it’s hard to function without it. BTW if you don’t know your love language it’s imperative you find out so you know how you need to be loved. 5 Love languages by Dr. Gary Chapman. When you don’t get your love language you just don’t function in the manner designed. This week I needed the physical touch. It’s not just the sex which most people think. It the holding of hands, hugging just a simple acknowledgement.  I know I craved it this week. It was weird because I almost didn’t even know what the feeling was. Long story short find your love language that makes you tick and someone to share that with because it make a crappy day better.





Day 18 Commitment

21 01 2013

Had a busy but really fun weekend with my kids. Morgan got to spend the night with some girls in the  complex and for a while I got to watch how girls interact. I still don’t understand it but I’m beginning to see what grown women are like. It starts at a young age for girls I wish we could observe has boys so we could learn then instead of in our 30’s lol.

I took my mom and son to a minor league hockey game and my son watched a little bit then wanted to climb on the rail until they smashed each other on the boards and  he looked at me and said that was awesome. They got into a fight and Brayden said I want to play this tomorrow. Well he’s my son for sure. Look out world.

Since I m single and I don’t have a fake girlfriend (maybe that’s easier) I read a lot about relationships and I also attend a new relationship class with church. I have a friend who also sends me emails to learn as well. I usually read and pick and choose and here is a great one about commitment that I wanted to share. Share your thoughts with  me please.

Contrary to what many people think, men are not averse to commitment. But there ARE a couple of things going on for men when it comes to choosing WHICH woman to commit to.

Knowing this is going to help you understand where we’re coming from… and how to create a lasting, secure relationship with a great guy.

So let’s get right to it…

Men have all kinds of ways of thinking, seeing things, and behaviors that aren’t completely conscious but are what I’ll call more BIOLOGICAL or INSTINCTUAL.

These are things that have been instilled in them over thousands and millions of years of “conditioning” during mating and courtship rituals with women.

When a man is looking for a woman, a part of his instinctual “wiring” unconsciously tells him to look for a woman who is healthy and “fit.” (Not just physically, but emotionally.

This means men are biologically wired to look for, and feel “attracted” to women who have the qualities and traits that indicate a high level of health and “fitness.”

But unfortunately, this “screening process” that’s going on inside a man’s mind is largely UNCONSCIOUS. In other words, a man can’t and won’t just walk up to a woman and say:

“Hi, I’m looking for a mate. I’d like to know if you would make a good mate for me. Are you any of the following?

  • Emotional stable and secure in yourself so you’ll make a great partner for me and allow me to expand in my life instead of having to stay “small” to make sure you’re comfortable?
  • Physically fit and healthy so you can conceive a healthy child, give birth, and raise him/her?
  • “Genetically fit” so that you have a high likelihood to bear successful offspring by passing off great qualities like size, strength, intelligence, immunity, etc?
  • Intelligent, “funny,” and resourceful so that you can not only be a mate that makes me feel attracted to you and want to conceive lots of children… but also help in this world of hard-to-come-by resources?
  • Going to make a great mother who can care for our child and raise it while I’m out trying to “provide?:

Catch my drift?

This is part of the reason why so often a woman will ask a man why he’s feeling one way or another… or why he’s acting different or not interested in a relationship and he can’t explain it.

Too many women have found that men can often be careless and lazy in relationships.

WRONG.

This is absolutely not true if you trigger the right feelings in your boyfriend in your relationship. Some men feel so strongly that they’d do anything to protect her and their relationship. And I mean ANYTHING:

  • He’d risk heartbreak
  • He’d spend all his money if he had to
  • He’d travel around the world just to be with you for a night
  • He’d even risk physical harm or DEATH just to keep you safe and protected

A man can and will become DEEPLY COMMITTED to his girlfriend and their relationship… if he is feeling the right things with her. If he knows she’s worth it.

And therein lies the secret…

How do you make a man feel so in love and so deeply connected and committed to you that he’d do anything for you, and never think twice about leaving or giving up?

Learn How His Commitment Process Works

Women who don’t understand what the dating and COMMITMENT PROCESS is like inside a man’s mind seem to keep running into the same painful situations, frustrations, and traps with men.

The way a man grows close to a woman, the reasons why he chooses her over another woman, and when and why he decides to start sharing himself with her and growing a real and committed relationship is simply different than it is for most women.

My program From Casual to Committed explains the entire dating and “commitment process” of a man, and I delivered this program live to real women like you.

It was a huge success, and it felt great to know that I not only answered the tough questions women had and needed answered in the live event… but that they were able to take what they learned, apply it in their lives, and get REAL RESULTS with the man in their life:

Don’t Make This Common Commitment Mistake

One of the biggest “make it or break it” points for women in relationships with men is when you start to grow close and want to move from just a casual and unspoken thing into a deeper and more serious relationship.

If you’ve ever felt “stuck” in your love life because you didn’t know how to break through the “casual dating” stage with a man and move into a real and committed relationship, I can help.

If you know much about men, then you probably already know that the answer with a man in this situation is NOT to ask him for a commitment. Lots of women try this and become frustrated and baffled when the man they thought they were close to completely pulls away from them and even tries to end the relationship all together.

If you want to grow your relationship with a man, the best way to move into a committed relationship isn’t to come up against his “EMOTIONAL RESISTANCE” to commitment when you bring it up.

The best relationships that women enjoy most, and that last the longest, are the ones where THE MAN is leading the woman into a committed relationship.

Where HE is asking HER to COMMIT TO HIM.

For the greatest chance at happiness and success with a man, and to be able to quickly and easily move from a casual situation to a real and committed relationship with a man, the answer is to learn:

  1. How the commitment process works for him, and what each of the critical steps and experiences are that he needs to have before he’ll truly physically and emotionally commit
  2. How to make a man want to be with you and lead you in to a committed relationship
  3. How to keep your relationship growing and healthy so that you both stay emotionally involved and fulfilled by the relationship

If you really want love in your life, and you want it to LAST on your next go round… then don’t wait for your relationship to figure itself out.

Empower yourself. Don’t wait for a man to figure it out and make your relationship work for you. Don’t wait until you’re dating the right guy and in a great relationship to learn how to help it grow and make it work with him.

It’s time for you to feel what love is meant to feel like when you know how to get a man to help make it last with you. Get started today by checking out my From Casual Committed program here:








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