Day 1566 Why didn’t you just ask

8 06 2017

Hello world: On Tuesday of this week I approved my book and it went to the printer. it took me 2.5 years to decided I was worth writing a book and anyone would read it. Yes Im excited but having it my hands will feel amazing. You better buy a copy pretty please.

Why? One of the most thought-provoking questions we can ask? On the other end is the answer. Sometimes its good and sometimes it’s not. So why do we stop asking Why as an adult. A few reasons I believe: We don’t care, the answer is going to hurt, we think we already know the answer. Little kids ask why all the time yes we get tired of hearing why and finally because we said so. That doesn’t stop them though.  Brian Dodge was a speaker I heard once and he said as an adult when we stop asking why our learning is over. How scary is that? So then we go to the famous art of assuming. Every time I assumed I was wrong. Do you remember the last time someone said Why didn’t you just ask me? You say I don’t know and walk away like why didn’t I just ask?

I’ll agree that when you ask sometimes the answer is awful. I asked my ex-wife when it was over do you love me anymore. She said no. My heart dropped to me knees I felt sick but I knew I needed to hear it. In college I asked a girl who was out of my league that I flirted with forever why wouldn’t you go out with me. She looked me in the eye and said I will you just have to ask me.

Why is  gathering wisdom, understanding, caring and respect. So the next time you don’t ask why just remember this is what you’re missing out on:

Showing someone you care, asking why is letting them you took time out for them their special, To eliminate confusion, To demonstrate humility to another, To enable a person to discover answers for themselves, To gain empathy through better understanding another’s view, To begin a relationship, To strengthen a relationship, To gain a person’s attention, To solve a problem.

Why you don’t ask these things are also possible: To find a culprit, To embarrass and shame, To appear superior, to create fear, To manipulate, To play the victim, as in, “Why is this happening to me?

Every time I don’t ask why I miss out on something. If you know me I ask a lot of questions not because I’m nosy but I care. I want to know you, I want to know what makes you tick, you’re special but I don’t know why until I know you. Its called conversation which I know is a dying art, but my best relationships are the ones where I know why and Im talking the dirty why too.

Why ask why. We need to know, someone needs to know you care. Love is asking why. Sometimes you don’t want to the but you might be pleasantly surprised what the answer really is.





Day 852 Its time to let go

27 05 2015

I was sitting in a courtroom this morning and its the last placed I thought I would be sitting. I wont go into details  but I was trying to get something that had belonged to me for three years. It was something that I never thought would get to this point but it did. Sooner or later you have to stand up for yourself and I did. I should have done it sooner but I can’t understand why in God’s name why this person still feels the way they do towards me, So that leads to this.

Call it forgiveness, letting go or just finding your happiness. It really doesn’t matter what someone has done or perceived done to you. If you still hold hatred, bitterness, fear, anger towards someone I’m betting they have moved on and your still holding on to it. Its like your drinking poison from a big cup but hoping the other person gets sick. They don’t get sick only you. Life will never be what you want or dream it to be if you hold onto the crap. You think if I continue to rip them apart, talk and say the worst things about them, poke holes in their weaknesses I’ll feel better and I’ll show them. It will never happen. The person being hurt is you! Again the only person hurt is you. Since we are human we are entitled to the feelings and hurting a hurt with a hurt sometimes would feel better until you do it then you realize you lowered yourself to the level of the person you can’t stand.

God forgave us all! Tyler stop talking about God you don’t understand. I do understand, what forgiveness does and you don’t forgive, you don’t get it back. Forgiveness isn’t for the other person its for you. Believe I have a list of about 5 people who if I could give a piece of my mind to I could make them cry and bring them to their knees but truthfully what does that do.  What you’re hoping for is that somebody that you loved or maybe didn’t doesn’t ever feel the way you did. I can honestly say I still care for the person and truly wish only great things for them, but seeing the feelings that they have cared with them their whole not about me but everyone from their past is downright sad.

IF your stuck and the only things you want to do is make someone like a fool in public, rip them apart on social media or talk crap to your kids about someone your truthfully the one that looks like a fool. Its time!!! Its time to let it go. Your life begins again when you realize the crap you hold onto is only poisoning you.

God gave me a 2nd chance to change my life and without forgiving my dad, and a few other people I would still be the miserable piece of crap I was. I’m living proof that forgiveness or letting go opens your eyes to life. Let go and let God. If you don’t believe in God I’m sorry but believe in something or your fall for anything!!!!





Day 600 Do you believe in me really?

18 09 2014

Trying to protect yourself from your kids and all of the other germ factories in their school is like trying to protect yourself from a rain cloud. We are all three sick. I’m better and now they are sick. With all the booggies, sneezing, Kleenex and washing hands we look like a soap opera.

We all search for the meaning in life. I’m searching for my meaning maybe when I find mine I can help you find yours. I can say I’m about as close as I will ever be. Yesterday I had the opportunity  speak to Brock  high school and Jr, high along with  30 adults.It accounted for around 425 kids.   The sense of being where your supposed to be is so peaceful to me. Sure I get nervous but it’s not for the reasons you think. I could care less what other people think of me, how they judge me or watch someone drop their jaw when I say the things I do. I get nervous because I have one shot to have the words that are needed. I pray to God that I can say the one thing that a kid or adult walks out with and sad that big bald guy said not to do this or do that.  The stories are true and I’m not lying about any of it. I just become peaceful because maybe one child walks away and their life changes and they don’t walk down the path of destruction I did. When you have a path of destruction not only do you hurt yourself but you’re dragging others along your nail ridden path too. You see kids looking at you like what a weirdo but when your done they know that they heard the truth. What they choose to do with it is up to them. When the talks were  over I got to shake a few hands and one girl named Brooke said to me. Do you believe the things you told us? I paused because I knew what I said next mattered. I said without a shadow of a doubt I  believe it and I believe in you. Whatever it is that is causing you confusion or anger you have to believe that it can change. She said I hope so and I have to go to class but thanks for pour your heart out.  I said wow and shook hands with her.

I was there in life and especially that age. I had a life nobody knew of and because the way I was wired I m not sure I believed anything except I can’t sit back and keep going down the path in life. I have to believe its going to be better and I had to believe in me. I believed I could things but wasn’t sure I could do good things. I felt her pain and wanted to do for more for her but I know she heard me. Its time like that I got in my car and prayed and thanked God that I got the chance.  Then I had a long drive back to Dallas where I questioned everything about what I said and did I make a difference. Do I believe in me?

No matter how far I’ve come I still struggle with me. The worst beatings I’ve ever had in my life I administered them to myself. I ask myself and sometimes and I always want to ask others Do you believe in me really? Sure you might say it doesn’t matter what others say. It does  and to know that someone believes in you because their not getting something from you that ,but they believe in you because they see things you can’t is an amazing feeling. Its been a long time since I believed in me and thought I had found what I should be doing. AS this journey continues to push on I ask that you pray for me to continue to believe that I can do this and that lives change because of my story and not me. God put us on this earth to help others and I finally believe  that I may be doing that.








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