Day 1067 My mom died yesterday

30 12 2015

We all know life can change in an instance and yesterday it did. My sister called me yesterday at 9:25 am hysterical and in between her tears she said mom is dead. I knew that it was not a joke of any sort. I asked her to calm down and she said the paramedics said she had been dead about 6 hours. The same way she fell asleep is the same way she died. She most likely died of a heart attack or blood clot. To say that sitting here in totally shock and numbness would be under statement. With my father I knew it was coming I got to say goodbye but not this time. I told my mom when she got home from work on Monday I loved her. I had no regrets with my mom. Dying peacefully is a great point but my only one now.

God didn’t ask me! People say when God is ready he will take them and that he did but my sister, our kids and I weren’t ready. How do you go from on a Monday shes still here then Tuesday shes not. I wish I could tell you I was mad, or confused but Im not. Ive cried a a lot in spurts. I lost it today when we picked the casket. We went through pictures at the funeral home, we gave her final clothes and I signed all the documents and sit in awe that it was over.

I know a lot of people have lost their parents and now I can sympathize with them but being 40 years old and filling like an orphan sucks. We do visitation Friday night and the service Saturday Im speaking about my mom at the service, I cant do justice to the women. She was truly the most amazing women I have ever known.

With my relationship with God being closer I get to put myself to work to make sure. As God and I go through the roller coaster I promise to continue to be vulnerable, honest and open as another journey starts for me. Please continue to read and encourage whenever you can.

Thank you so much for the people who have reached out, with so many great words, support, and love. If you pray we could use it now. If you don’t I’ll take a high five. Here’s to another unexpected journey! Love ya

 

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10 responses

30 12 2015
Wally Fry

Hey, I know you read faithfully and thanks. Gosh…very sorry for this. What a shock.

30 12 2015
Erica

“All life is is four or five big days that change everything.” Movie quote. Lol. I lost my dad twice. At 16 when he had a stroke that changed who he was and our lives. Again as an adult when he went on to be with our God. He (my dad) told me once “it doesn’t matter how old you are, you’re never ready for your parents to die, it still hurts”. I heard those words when my mom passed on. She was everything to me. My best friend, my teacher, my strength. Fortunately she made me strong enough to get thru the loss. I feel the pain in your heart my friend. My prayers go out to you and your sister. Heads up T!

31 12 2015
Karen

Very sorry for your loss, Ty. I can fully understand the ‘orphaned’ feeling. My father died three years ago; we knew it was inevitable and yet, I was ‘orphaned’. This feeling is independent of one’s own age…

31 12 2015
atimetoshare

Sorry for your loss.

31 12 2015
agenda19892010

A better new year for you my friend by Rinaldo.

31 12 2015
MeRaw

So very sorry for your loss.
May your mum rest peacefully.
x

1 01 2016
Ellespeth

I’m so sorry, Ty.
Ellespeth

9 01 2016
kerbey

I’m sorry.

25 01 2016
Little Miss Menopause

I wanted to give you a little time and space before I reached out to give you a virtual hug and offer condolences for such a sudden and shocking loss. My father was taken without any notice (perfect health) and the lack of closure from so many unfinished problems and conversations just about kills me too. That truly is the most difficult part, although nobody wants to see anyone suffer with long term illness but at least you can prepare a little bit and be sure and say goodbye and resolve unfinished business. I just wanted to let you know I can identify with you and I hope you’re hanging in there.
Hugs,
Stephanie

25 01 2016
tywood12

Thank you so much. I truly appreciate that. Big hug

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