Fay 750 Faith or Control

16 02 2015

It’s a blessing and a curse to have joint custody of your children after divorce. The blessings are too many to count but the hardest is when I get them back I have actually seen them change. Not only physically but mentally and emotional. I get my kids back on Fridays and seeing my daughter had a 7th grade Valentine dance. When I saw her in her dress I couldn’t believe that it was her but it was like looking at what I thought she would look like in the future. I’m just thankful I can see her and my son as much as I do but its tough watching them grow up and I’m not there.

Faith or control? Which one are you and if 100% of people were truthful we are all about the control. Faith- Faith is defined as confidence or trust in a being, object, living organism, deity, view, or in the doctrines or teachings of a religion, as well as confidence based on some degree of warrant. It can also be belief that is not based on proof. The word faith is often used as a synonym for hope, for trust, or for belief. Control-Toexercise authoritative or dominating influence over. 

The question to me is why. Faith you cannot see. Control you can. You can make someone do something and you control that situation or you perceive you do. Faith is letting go and not many of us a real good at that. I was the worlds worst control freak and we all know that control freaks control nothing no matter how much we want to believe we do. We can’t make someone love us, we can’t make problems go away, we can’t solve addiction, we cant  control people decisions at work. No matter the best plans ever put together Gods plan is what it is and that’s the bottom line. My favorite saying is that if you want to make God laugh tell him your plans. If your plans are based on your control and not your faith then your plans will fail. You may get what you want but in the long run it winds up turning into sour grapes.

My whole life was like this: God its  11 I’m going to lunch and Ill be back at 1. If you don’t accomplish what I need by then  Ill take over. I mean I’ve always taken care of the way it was supposed to go (sarcasm). Here is a great example from this past week. I needed my sub contractors  to finish building a fence for a house were building. I set it up and even called the sub Wednesday morning to make sure he was going to be there. I had taken control  and we were golden. Well long story short the sub I talked to died in a car accident Wednesday morning, I was sad for him but I was also upset because now the fence wasn’t going to be  get finished which then would push back the closing and so on and so forth. What wound up happening is that the inspector that was supposed to be there the next day couldn’t make it and the customer and to push back the closing a day. It worked out the way it should. My control I put on it did nothing. Faith would say the only thing I can do is my part and the rest has nothing to do with me. Every morning we wake up once we hit the alarm the only thing we control if were allowed to wake up is hitting the alarm to go off and getting out of bed. After that its a crap shoot no matter how organized, put together or what a great planner you are. It’s easy to think we can control our kids, our life, and everything it. I know some great parents that I’ve patterned myself after and guess what their kids fell of the wagon. Not because the parents were  but because we don’t control our kids once they leave the house. We all that all american couple and because they tried to control the spouse they pushed them further away. In your life when someone tries to control you how do you feel and your like I don’t think so sucker.

My closet friend Jim said about me on my trip back from California that you seemed not to give a crap. That you were so care free with your decisions. My response. I lacked faith. God allowed me with my free will to control my life and with it, hit rock bottom,  I burned so many bridges, lost my best friend, lost my business, filed bankruptcy, lost my marriage, my home and essentially everything I thought I controlled. You see how well that turned out.  The last three years I’m LEARNING that God will handle it if I allow him with my walk of faith. I may not like his plan but his plan has worked out every-time. I really wound up liking it in the end and all I did was give up my control which I truly sucked at. You cannot see faith  but I promise if you follow faith you will be standing  exactly where you wanted to be.  So I expect all of you to read this or I wont blog tomorrow! (Get it)




One response

16 02 2015

One of the most difficult things to do is float – not paddle even a little with wiggling hands, not kick, just float. While God is pretty busy with major things – and he gave people a brain to use – it’s difficult to remember while daily incidents of routine may be managed, humans have little stroke in the long wide stream of existence. We don’t have the big ocean charts, so how could we know what to push and what to let glide. Floating is hard, but a real life skill in so many ways

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