Day 489 Final part of my childhood is gone

2 06 2014

Ever been somewhere and you ask yourself why in the hell am I here. I had that moment last night and so I left. Sometimes you are places you shouldn’t be for many reason but mostly because that place is sapping the life out of. Lesson learned!

We all lose things in our lives some good, some bad, some necessary and then there are those things that you wish you never had to lose. I have wrote many times about my childhood and my father becoming disabled and the burden it put on our family. Everyone of my birthday, Christmas, or any special occasion present/gift was sold, pawned or traded. It was out of necessity but it was because no matter what my parents wanted to hold onto the 50 acres of land and house that they owned. I took care of the place probably until about 2008 and then my sister took over the duties. It had become too much and my mom needed to get away from it, her health is not good and she needed to be closer to us. This coming Tuesday at 2:00 our place is sold and being closed on. 37 years in our family and tons of memories. I know the memories never leave but something about when it’s not yours anymore just changes the way you see it. I drove down today to say goodbye to the place. I got about a mile away and got very emotional. The roads are the places I trained for sports, the trees and house around ours are where I learned so many of my country ways.

My mom and dad bringing me there in the first pictures I remember seeing. My neighbor Mrs. Riley who lived across the highway that was practically my grandma. She fed me and told great stories that always caused me to want to go over their every day and eat. We had a stock tank it’s where I caught my first fish, shot my first armadillo, built my first baseball field. I go into my first fight and broke my nose, we played tackle football in my front yard everyday in the summer until people got tired of me hitting them,I played first and only game of catch with my dad there. My sister and I built a slip and slide and we would also go on the porch and talk. It was the last place my dad drove his tractor. My dad built a 1 acre garden and my mom cooked it or stored it. My mom always swept the porch after I mowed and I loved it because for a strange reason it made her happy. I had my second kiss there, and a first of a couple of other things. It was the first place my daughter skipped a rock and shot her BB gun.  We never had a shower just a tub but at times I miss just taking a bath. We had an antenna for TV and I would have to go turn it to get the TV to come in and sometimes hold in that place until my dads show was over. The best meals I have ever eaten were there. My mom was awesome cook and it helped me grow into a strapping young man. The first tornado I was ever in was there when we lost our chickens my pony and the trampoline ended up perfectly balanced on the top of the telephone pole. I camped there for the first time, got our car stuck before our first baby shower and stripped down to my underwear and dug the car out. It was the first place I went after my divorce. Its peaceful and quite and you can see the stars, All of them. We brought my dad home from the hospital to die at home and have a sense of peace which he did. I remember so much good and bad and wish it could be ours but the time has come to give it to someone else so they can make their memories.  Saddest part for me is that my childhood is gone now. I could go there and just sit and listen if anything that place was mine and nothing could take that from me. Just another thing that nobody can explain to you about being an adult.




3 responses

2 06 2014

I’m so glad you have these memories and a place you could call home for 37 years. That’s a wonderful gift in life.
Hope the children and well…

2 06 2014

Thank you so much

2 06 2014

Reblogged this on Views From A Poet and commented:
Take a peek at this…some sad is there but what wonderful memories.

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