Day 466 Honesty is the liar

21 04 2014

This past week was my toughest as a single parent yet. My daughter had surgery and went from Miss independent to totally needy. I dealt with a roller coaster of emotions with her having the surgery, was I doing a good enough job taking care of her, what I still being a good daddy to my son and still doing all the things you have to do. My half-sister then became very sick and they had to sedate her and put her on a ventilator. Honestly I know I’m whining and sound but I really don’t care if you think that  because it was just a struggle. I think I handle it okay on the outside but inside it hurt pretty bad. To top it off I have realized that if you’re not getting one of your love language filled your going to be out of sorts. Mine is physical touch and quality time. Its been 3 years and I can tell I need it. This week would have been great to be able to just sit down with someone on the couch and hold their hand and have them listen to me or say nothing and just be content. Oh well its a new week so back to be awesome!!! lol

If you know me I’m blatantly honest sometimes I have been told to honest. That maybe one of the dumbest things I have ever heard but I have. The past two weeks I have these things. Please be honest with me no matter how bad it hurts. Okay are you sure? Then I tell them and I get I didn’t think you would do it and that really hurt.  Or another: You should never be that honest with someone it only causes problems. Another: Don’t you know people can’t handle the truth so just tell them what makes them feel better. Or my favorite of this week: You made the mistake you don’t have to make it worse by telling the truth.

Yes all of those are true. I’m not saying everyone but society has a whole has got so used to lying that honesty is actually the liar. People would rather be lied to that actually hear the truth. Have you ever noticed that when people catch someone in a lie they say well that’s just who they are, but if you tell the truth they are actually mad and say can you believe the nerve of that asshole. We lie to ourselves so much that we begin to believe it so why should we let someone else tell us the truth. This is a problem that you can see everywhere you go and almost every situation you’re in.  We have accepted lying as the correct behavior. Even though we say always tell the truth and be honest with me that’s not what people want to hear. My response to them is please tell me the last time being honest was wrong. Just because it hurts doesn’t make it wrong it makes it what you need to hear. If you cry or get pissed maybe that’s what you need so you can correct  whatever it is that’s ailing you. Yes how you put something should be thought of too, and the truth hurts, but the truth can always set you free. If you tell someone the truth and they don’t want to have anything to do with you so what. Move on if not your going to have the hell to pay now or later.

If you want me to instantly shove you aside lie to me. If I did something wrong, I pissed you off, I hurt your feelings, I was rude. Please tell me how I react to it is my problem not yours. I’m not perfect but I can’t fix something if I don’t know about it. I appreciate honesty and yes it does hurt. If you lie to me I lose respect for you and will not have you in my life. I can find plenty of liars what I need are those people who care enough about me to be real. Being real allows relationships to grow and bonds to be cemented. Why do we teach our kids not to lie but as adults we will do it without thinking about. If honesty is a liar take a deep look at your relationships and see why they struggle. I bet you know the answer now.

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